Bride to Be 2023: Here’s What You Need To Do First
(Image by Dina Diaz Photo)
So you just got engaged…congrats!
It is engagement season after all. But what do you do now? If you’re what I like to call a ‘DIY Bride’ you’ll most likely be the one that wants to dive right into planning the wedding and getting boxes checked off.
Go you!
That’s great you want to start chipping away at your wedding to-do list but what about the vision? No, not the vision of the wedding, but the vision of yourself. You, as a bride. The bride.
Is this a lifestyle change for you?
Do you see that there’s going to need to be a game plan to reach your vision?
If you already see yourself ready to get married, can you envision yourself feeling confident walking down the aisle in front of all your family & friends?
If you’re anything like me, you won’t take your journey from “Miss to Mrs” lightly. You see it as an identity shift, and although it’s a sweet one, it can be a lot between the planning & holding that vision of your future partnership that can get through the tales of time.
There’s a reason why they make wine glasses that say “This is my wedding planning glass” and how why the Betches Brides podcast (great podcast btw) has the slogan “for the wedding obsessed and the brides that are stressed”. Wedding planning includes tackling not just logistics, but your emotions through this season.
It’s simple: planning a big life event like this (whether you’re eloping or not) has a lot of elements of stress to it. It can bring out sides of you that you didn’t mean to evoke: bossiness, people-pleasing, guilt, overwhelm, and of course bridezilla.
But what if you knew exactly how to avoid or at least face these emotions? That would be so helpful, right? Heck yeah!
So how does one do that, because it’s easier said than done.
Here’s an excerpt from my new e-book to give you a taste.
“Q: What to do when you start to feel nervous?
A: Redirect the present feeling into excitement. Feeling nervous can quickly become overwhelming and make you feel nauseous. Your body might feel scared. This is going to be just one very big moment in your life so get excited instead. You need this big energy you feel inside to help you remember this important day in your life. Let that empower you to feel so positive and focused on what’s about to happen in a positive way. Have gratitude for this moment that you get to live.
Try one or all of these to help center you: Put one hand on your heart & one on your belly and tell yourself, “I am safe”. Scream “I’m getting married today!”. Smile your biggest smile. Dance! Move that energy for a moment and then breathe in and feel the bliss that comes over you. It’s almost relaxing, like a high. That is your state of bliss. You are choosing to own the moment and control how this goes for you. This GETS to be your big day. Make it work for you.”
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It’s a new year, new decade, and it’s time to step into your best self yet.
This post is not about how to stick to a resolution, it’s about coming to a realization that your life is about to change because you are getting married this year. You are going to become a wife. Your identity is going to shift. I believe awareness is a powerful tool and becoming aware of what’s ahead is helpful to prepare yourself for what’s to come.
Let’s not get overwhelmed with what could happen. Let’s not stress about being overstressed. Let’s learn to accept ourselves when we aren’t on a diet. Let’s learn to love ourselves at every phase of our lives. Let’s finally learn how to care for ourselves before we need to, so that when you are finally married and then maybe start to have kids, that you’ll know how to treat yourself and then take care of others.
Diets– Can we all just recognize that the word ‘diet’ includes the word ‘die’? Maybe a dramatic look on the word, but let’s be real, the word is always followed by a huge, longsigh. So screw it! Words of encouragement: Focus on fueling your body with what you know deep down inside you need first. Girl, if that is a piece of dark chocolate, do it. I think you’ll find that it isn’t that cheesy, stuffed jalapeno wrapped in bacon, but more like a glass of water or well, maybe just a few bites of lemon zested kale first.
Stress– Ah! Such a heavy thing this can be! I can count on all my fingers and toes the times I’ve heard women say they want to learn how to be less stressed. Why? Stress helps you get things done, it helps you fight or flight. Stress tells you when you made a bad decision. Learn from this! Pay attention when stress is kicking in and choose whether it needs to be present or not.
Routine– I am the last person on the planet who can tell you the perfect routine for you because I am routinely trying new routines, pun intended! There are 4 seasons in a year, which probably means, you’ll be in at least 4 different stages of routine per year. The beautiful part of this is that you get to decide what that looks like for you. Some parts of the year I need to be at the gym 5 days a week to manage my stress, and other times I desire yoga and dance for my soul. I am in charge of what my routine looks like and no one can take that from me. Say it with me: No one can take that from me. The best routine for yourself is when you put yourself first.
The Best Version of You– The best for last. The part where you can let your imagination run wild and envision what the best version of you actually looks like. Close your eyes for 5, maybe even 10 minutes if you have it, and visualize what you see when you are post-wedding and the bride bliss starts to slow, and things go back to “normal”. Are you still taking care of yourself even though you aren’t wedding prepping? Write what you see down on paper. This is your starting point. This is where you decide to make a conscious effort to change for more than just the wedding, but for your soon-to-be husband, your dog, your future children, and most importantly your future self. Cheers to future you, girl!
I hope this unconventional post from a bridal artist moves you to not only be a bride in 2020 but a ‘bride for life’. You deserve all the pampering and care in the world, so embrace this!
With love and energy,
Chelsea
About the author–My name is Chelsea and I’ve served as a makeup artist for nearly a decade. I’ve transformed more faces than I can think of and curled way more heads of hair than I have ever curled my own. If hair & makeup wasn’t a gift bestowed upon me, well by now it is a superpower. I can’t unlearn it and I don’t want to! I love having the skillset to beautify brides and bridesmaids for weddings in San Diego (my main niche) and the special opportunity my brideys give me when I am apart of their special occasion!! You can learn more about me in the About section.
